I grew up in a small Iowa town and was baptized as an infant in the Catholic church. We rarely went to church, though (mostly just Christmas and Easter). I was raised in a family with an abusive, alcoholic father who was either working, drinking or sleeping. I had a loving mother who did the best she could to provide, but was also working a lot. I was exposed to pornography at a young age and dealt with verbal and physical abuse. I got involved in sports, which was an outlet for me and a way to escape. Age 16 marked some not-so-good milestones in my life, as my parents got divorced and I was put on probation for vandalism and theft. Life after high school included partying, drinking, a couple stints in jail and an OWI. Things weren’t looking good.

After a year of working and going to Iowa Central Community College, I decided to attend Grand View University, mainly because I wanted to run cross country and track. My identity was still in my successes and failures in competition and in many nights of partying. At the age of 20 the “fun stuff” I was doing and collegiate competition didn’t satisfy me. I was left searching for something to fill me. 

Around this same time, I was invited by my dad to go to church with him and his new wife. It was here that a sweet old woman presented the Gospel to me for the first time in my life. I had never heard how my sin separated me from a Holy God and how Jesus came to save sinners like me. However, I continued to live life for myself and chased after the things that I thought would bring happiness.

When I was 21, God started using people to get my attention. A couple guys I had met at Grand View invited me to attend the campus fellowship bible study. Through this, God started to open my eyes. I started attending a nearby Baptist church, going to the campus fellowship Bible study and hanging out with some Christian guys.

In March of 2009, I was at church. God spoke through the pastor that day to pierce my heart of stone. At this moment, the realization of my need of a Savior, someone to pay the penalty for my sins, had sunk in.

“Jesus told him, “I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one can come to the Father except through me.” John 14:6

It was at this time that the Gospel sunk in. The fact that I was going to stand before God and give an account of my life and that nothing can be hidden from Him was very sobering.

“Nothing in all creation is hidden from God. Everything is naked and exposed before his eyes, and he is the one to whom we are accountable.” Hebrews 4:13

I understood the weight of my sin, the magnitude of Jesus’ death and resurrection, my need of a Savior and that there was nothing I could do to earn my salvation.

 “For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God, not a result of works, so that no one may boast.” Ephesians 2:8-9

I approached the altar and knelt down, crying, and asked God to forgive me of my sin and accepted Jesus Christ as my Lord and Savior. 

God humbled me and I was finally at the point of true repentance and surrender. My entire life of running after power, popularity and pleasure to satisfy, was finally filled by Jesus! I had a new identity, one not wrapped in worldly pursuits, but in Christ!

“Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come.” 2 Corinthians 5:17

My old life and old self have been left behind, buried with Christ. A little over a year later, I was obedient to Christ and was baptized to publicly declare what Jesus had done in my life through salvation in Him. I am so thankful that God chose to pursue me even when my only desire was to glorify myself. All glory and praise to God!